Ah, the age-old parenting dilemma: Is my child thriving under their accommodations, or are we all just spinning our wheels in a high-stakes game of academic charades? If you’ve ever stared at your kid’s IEP or 504 Plan and thought, Are we doing this right?, you’re in good company. Spoiler alert: You don’t need a PhD in child psychology to crack the code. (But hey, a strong coffee and Wi-Fi connection help.)
Here’s your no-nonsense guide to figuring out if your child’s accommodations are actually working—or if it’s time to schedule a “friendly” meeting with the school.
1. Watch for the Big Three: Progress, Behavior, and Vibes
First things first, let’s talk metrics. No, not the Excel kind—thankfully.
Progress: Is your child actually meeting their goals? For example, if the IEP says they should write a paragraph without summoning existential dread by mid-semester, are they doing it?
Behavior: Are tantrums, shutdowns, or mysterious stomach aches on the decline? Or does your child still approach school like it’s the fifth circle of Dante’s Inferno?
Vibes: Does your kid seem, dare we say, happier? Or at least less like they’re starring in their own personal drama, A Series of Unfortunate Homework Assignments?
If you’re nodding along, congrats—something’s working! If not, buckle up. We’re diving deeper.
2. Ask the Real Experts (a.k.a., Your Child)
Here’s the revolutionary idea: ask your kid. (Wild, right?)
Use open-ended questions like, “How do you feel about math class now that you get extra time?” Avoid leading questions like, “Your accommodations are AMAZING, aren’t they?”
Gauge their confidence. If they suddenly know they can tackle a spelling test without breaking into a cold sweat, that’s a win.
Pro tip: Bribe them with a snack for honesty. The truth comes out faster when Oreos are involved.
3. Talk to Their Teachers (Diplomatically)
Teachers are your boots-on-the-ground allies, even if it doesn’t always feel that way after your third email with 14 bullet points.
Ask for specific examples of how accommodations are being implemented. (Yes, Karen, “We’re doing our best” is not a valid metric.)
Request progress updates that go beyond vague phrases like, “They’re doing fine.” (Define fine, Sharon.)
Pro tip: Approach these conversations like a team effort. Nobody likes a “My kid is perfect, and you’re the problem” parent.
4. Data: The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly
Collect the receipts, folks.
Grades: Are they trending up, staying stable, or free-falling like your Wi-Fi during a Zoom call?
Work Samples: Compare assignments from the start of the year to now. Is there noticeable improvement?
Observations: Keep a journal of your own. (Think less Dear Diary and more, “Noticed fewer meltdown Mondays since we implemented XYZ.”)
5. When in Doubt, Pivot
If the data looks grim, it’s time to revisit the plan. Accommodations aren’t set in stone; they’re more like a first draft.
Request a formal review meeting.
Come prepared with evidence, suggestions, and a calm-but-firm “Let’s make this better” vibe.
Remember: schools are obligated to provide what’s appropriate, not perfect. (But we can all dream, can’t we?)
6. Celebrate the Wins (No Matter How Small)
Whether it’s a full paragraph written without tears or a “Good job!” sticker from a teacher, celebrate it. Parenting a kid with accommodations is a marathon, not a sprint, and every victory counts. Bonus: Positive reinforcement for your child is like the parenting cheat code.
Wrapping It Up
So, are your child’s accommodations working? Only you—and maybe your kid, their teachers, and a small village—can answer that. The process involves a little detective work, a lot of patience, and the occasional coffee-fueled existential crisis. But when it works, the payoff is huge: a happier, more confident kid who knows they’re supported every step of the way.
Call or text 614-470-4466, email admin@achievepsychology.org, or visit www.achievepsychology.org to learn more about making accommodations work for your child.
Works Cited
“The Impact of Accommodations on Academic Performance.” Journal of Learning Disabilities, 2020.
“Effective Parent-Teacher Collaboration in Special Education.” Educational Psychology Review, 2019.
Smith, J., & Taylor, R. “Behavioral Outcomes in Children with IEPs.” Child Development Quarterly, 2021.
“Monitoring Academic Progress for Students with Disabilities.” Special Needs Education Today, 2022.
“Neurodiversity in the Classroom.” The Inclusive Educator’s Handbook, 2018.
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