Coping Mechanisms: The Good, the Bad, and the Self-Sabotaging

Ever binge-watched an entire season of TV just to “unwind”—and felt worse after? Or snapped at someone because you “just needed to vent”?

We all cope. But how we cope can either heal us… or quietly sabotage everything we're trying to hold together.

Here’s a breakdown of common coping mechanisms, from helpful to harmful, and how to make the shift toward better ones.

✅ Healthy Coping Mechanisms

1. Movement & Exercise

Not just for aesthetics—physical activity reduces cortisol and boosts dopamine and serotonin. Walking counts. Dancing in your kitchen counts.

2. Mindfulness & Deep Breathing

Even five minutes of focused breathing can calm your nervous system. Mindfulness isn't about perfection—it's about presence.

3. Therapy & Support Groups

Talking it out with someone trained to listen (or who deeply gets it) helps you process instead of suppress.

4. Creative Expression

Journaling, drawing, music, even rearranging furniture. Channel your energy into creation instead of implosion.

5. Saying No

Setting boundaries might feel selfish, but it’s actually how we protect our energy and sanity.

⚠️ Mixed Bag Mechanisms (use with awareness)

6. Humor

Laughter can heal, but when it masks pain or becomes deflection, it stops being helpful.

7. Productivity

Checking off to-do’s feels great—but using busyness to avoid emotions is just distraction dressed as success.

8. Venting

A good rant can feel cathartic… until it becomes a looping complaint cycle that reinforces helplessness.

9. Isolation “for peace”

Alone time is golden—but withdrawing from everyone all the time? That’s a red flag, not a recharge.

10. Food & Comfort Rituals

Eating for comfort isn’t evil—but when it’s your only tool, it stops soothing and starts numbing.

🚩 Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms

11. Substance Use

That glass of wine every night? Not always harmless. Especially if it’s used to quiet anxiety or shut off your brain.

12. Self-Criticism

Beating yourself up isn’t motivation—it’s psychological self-harm.

13. Avoidance

Ignoring the email, the call, the bill, the diagnosis—avoidance provides relief now but costs more later.

14. Over-Control

Micromanaging your schedule, your body, your partner’s tone—control is a reaction to fear, not a solution to it.

15. Doomscrolling

You’re not getting more informed—you’re reinforcing anxiety. The world’s chaos isn’t your job to monitor 24/7.

🧠 How to Upgrade Your Coping

• Notice what you reach for without thinking.

• Ask: “Does this help me long-term or just shut down discomfort right now?”

• Create a “coping swap” list: What can I do instead that still gives me relief?

• Talk to someone about it—therapist, friend, even your notes app. Awareness is step one.

The Takeaway

Coping isn’t the problem. Default coping is. When you consciously choose tools that support—not sabotage—your mental health, you’re not just surviving. You’re healing.

Need help building healthier coping strategies? We’ve got you.

📞 Call or text: 614-470-4466

📧 Email: admin@achievepsychology.org

🌐 Visit: www.achievepsychology.org

References:

American Psychological Association. (2023). Coping Mechanisms: Healthy vs. Unhealthy.

Lazarus, R. S., & Folkman, S. (1984). Stress, Appraisal, and Coping.

Neff, K. D. (2003). Self-Compassion: An Alternative to Self-Esteem.

Folkman, S. (2008). The Case for Positive Emotions in the Stress Process.

Brené Brown. (2012). Daring Greatly.